Devastation

Have you ever hit by a giant wave of helplessness that you just shut yourself down so that you can even function? Or felt guilty because the only way you can hold it together and keep going is to “avoid” being exposed to all the news about the biggest disaster that literally torn down 10 cities of your beloved country and caused over 31,000 people to die. Not even mentioning millions of people who lost everything they have overnight and are trying to survive the harshest winter conditions and they are reliant on other people to help them.

I can not find words to express the emotional deadlock that I have been in during the past week. I am going back and forth between feeling sad, frusturated, and helpless and trying to continue my daily routines just to keep sane. I even feel guilty now that I am writing this post and talking about my feelings while people are fighting for their lives. I know that good things are happening and people were brought together by this disaster, but, recovering from it will take a long time and we will never be healed completely.

There is so much more to say and nothing to say at the same time while everything seems meaningless. I am just very sorry for the people who lost their lives, their loved ones, and their everything within 2 minutes…