Monthly Archives: November 2017

Finding God Through Rejection

November 2017, , ,

Mike Anderson, Senior Anchor Intern

“Poo-tee-weet”

If you ever read Slaughterhouse-five by Kurt Vonnegut, you may recognize that quote as Billy Pilgrim’s response when someone dies (and since he is a soldier during World War II, he is well acquainted with death). It shows how Billy has learned to just accept death and think nothing of it–there’s no emotion, no sense of caring, just “poo-tee-weet”.

As I enter into a time when I am applying for post graduation programs, I find myself becoming more and more like Billy Pilgrim. When I am rejected by a school, I don’t react with any sort of emotion, with any care about the time and thought that went into the application, nor with any loss of hope of going to the school I was interested in- no, just “poo-tee-weet”. As I talk with my friends who are also working through rejection, I find that they generally have one of two different reactions- no emotion as I do or too much emotion that causes the person to feel less about themselves. But is this how it should be or is there a better way to react to rejection?

As I work to answer this question, I thought about previous times I was faced with rejection and where that led me to. I immediately thought of this past summer when I participated in a research program at the University of Minnesota, a program that initially was one of my least favorite choices. I was hoping to be able to spend my summer somewhere new and interesting- Uganda, Nashville or New York City- or at a program that had some more built-in mentoring for their summer undergraduate researchers. After applying to seven research programs and two ISSLP sites and receiving eight rejections, I wasn’t left with much of a choice. So, I went to Minnesota and now could not be happier that I did. While there, I was part of a large community of undergraduate researchers that all worked together to grow in our researching skills. Since we all lived on the same floor of a dorm, we quickly became great friends who would enjoy many events that the twin cities had. My research mentor gave me more mentorship than I thought any professor would in one summer and I was able to meet and learn from many medical and graduate students. It was a great program for me to learn, grow, and make many connections with people who could answer any question I had. And I only went there, because I was rejected from the other programs.

Mike with many of the friends he made this summer at the University of Minnesota.

The next experience of rejection that came to mind was last year’s Keenan Revue. Having been part of the stage crew for my first two years, I decided that I wanted to help out more and apply to be the assistant stage director and leader of the stage crew. Since I had the experience and knew both the director and producer, I was confident that I’d get that job. When staff announcements came out, I was given the job of props manager (a job they intended for a freshman) while a freshman was chosen to be assistant stage director. This time, rather than just saying “poo-tee-weet” and calling it a day, I was quite upset. I took this one more personally as someone who has never seen the Revue before was picked over me and they relegated me to (what was supposed to be) the much easier job. It was difficult for me to be excited to do any work for the Revue when I felt as if they did not find me worthy of a significant role. However, fitting in with the theme of this blog, everything worked out for the best. Long before the first show, I started to gather all the props that we needed- sometimes fun, sometimes challenging, sometimes odd (like buying a toilet, wigs, and many pieces of women’s clothing). But during the show, I not only contributed with my props but ended up being in charge of many members of the stage crew as if I was stage manager. In the end, I did the same job as if I were assistant stage director like I originally wanted but was also able to contribute to the show in additional ways. By the end of the last show, both the producer and director told me they were happy that I got that job- because they no longer thought a freshman could have done it.

Mike talking with some of the stage crew prior to one of the shows.

So while I thought I knew what would be best for me, I soon realized that my initial plans might not have been the best option for me. I’m not sure that if the choice was left up to me, I would have realized this before it was too late. In reality, the best option for me was rejection from places that weren’t right for me or jobs that would have limited what I could do. It might have been difficult to take at that time, but in hindsight, it most likely made my life much easier.

In times of rejection, I now look to find the good that comes out of it- an easier decision, more time to spend on another goal of mine, advantages that one job/program/internship has over another- and I’d encourage you to do the same. While the good that comes out of rejection may not always be clear right away, in my experience eventually I am able to find what good could come out of the rejection. I trust that you, too, can find that there is always a plan for you, and it isn’t always what you think it is.

Finding Fulfillment

November 2017, ,

Daniel Jasek, Senior Anchor Intern

What am I here for? What really matters? Who should I strive to be?

These are existential thoughts that have been around for millennia. Ultimately, I think they boil down to one question – What will make me happy? Or, put a different way, how can I find fulfillment? This question is one I have asked myself often, and over the past few years, I believe God has guided me closer to the answer.

As I went through my freshman year at Notre Dame, I knew I needed to pick something to do over the upcoming summer. I decided to give the Summer Service Learning Program a shot, and was placed at The Mission of Our Lady of the Angels site. “The Mission” is a Catholic apostolate on the West Side of Chicago run by the Franciscans of the Eucharist of Chicago. Going into that summer, I was very unaware of the Grace I would experience (In a very literal sense – Grace is the name of the Mission’s German Shepherd). In all seriousness, that summer turned out to be the greatest one of my life, an extremely profound experience of God’s love and grace. I could write you a whole semester’s worth of blogs about it, but I’ll try to stick to this one.

Summer 2015 – The sisters and the summer volunteers

During the summer, I became a part of the Mission’s work to serve the neighborhood around them, a neighborhood scarred by poverty and violence. I helped with their food pantry, food and clothing giveaways, block parties, and whatever cleaning, donation-sorting, or yard work needed to be done. My main role for most of the summer was working as a summer camp counselor at the nearby YMCA that the Mission works closely with.

Doing all of this kept me very busy, and usually the days were so full of work, prayer, and community events that there was not much time that I could spend however I pleased. Initially, this frustrated me. However, I eventually noticed that on days when I thought more about myself, I was more stressed, anxious, and just generally miserable. But on days that I fully gave myself over to things outside of me, I found more fulfillment and happiness. Of course, I could have just learned this the easy way by listening when Jesus told me “Give and gifts will be given to you; a good measure, packed together, shaken down, and overflowing, will be poured into your lap. For the measure with which you measure will in return be measured out to you.” (Luke 6:38). I think that an experiential understanding of this Christian paradox is one of the keys to a fulfilled life. Not having as much free time was a gift in itself, a chance to realize what really mattered and strip out what didn’t.

I also found great fulfillment and joy in simple Christian community at the Mission. We truly cannot live the Christian life alone, and my summer volunteer group was able to experience community life with the sisters in a beautiful way. We shared in daily Mass, the day’s work, Holy Hours, and meals with them. For the Franciscans there, meals are an intentional way of forming and expressing community. It was not uncommon for the process of gathering for dinner, eating, and cleaning up to take two hours. Interacting with the sisters was also an absolute privilege. They are some of the most faithful and inspiring people I have ever met, and they have many talents. Sr. Alicia is a former winner of the show “Chopped”, and Sr. Stephanie is a marathon runner who has approached Olympic-qualifying times. But even more amazing are their qualities of faithfulness, selflessness, and ability to make you feel welcomed and at home, wherever you encounter them. The love, support, and example of all the sisters and everyone else at the Mission was so helpful for me, especially after long days. We are truly the Body of Christ, and “The eye cannot say to the hand, ‘I do not need you’” (1 Corinthians 12:21). If we are looking for fulfillment, we cannot forget C.S. Lewis’ words: “Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbor is the holiest object presented to your senses” (The Weight of Glory).

Fast forward 2+ years. This semester, my friend and former site-partner Will Niermeyer organized an informal fall break trip to the Mission, and I wholeheartedly joined in. It was an amazing blessing to be able to spend another week in service, community, and prayer, this time with several more good friends. That week, there was nowhere else I wished to be. I felt perfectly filled.

Fall break 2017 – Franciscans and friends (and Grace)

God has definitely been at work in my life over these past few years, from when I went to the Mission the first time to when I returned just a few weeks ago. Even still, during this time I have also struggled with fulfillment, wondering how I could “get back” what I felt like I had at the Mission because everyday life didn’t always seem to live up. I then read these beautiful words from Caryll Houselander’s Reed of God:

“Sometimes it may seem to us that there is no purpose in our lives, that going day after day for years to this office or that school or factory is nothing else but waste and weariness. But it may be that God has sent us there because but for us Christ would not be there. If our being there means Christ is there, that alone makes it worthwhile.”

Even though I cannot always be on a service trip or at the Mission, I can always be an open vessel to God, letting myself be “filled with Christ”, and then bring Him wherever I go. This gives me a sense of great hope. I will always be fulfilled when I let God fill me with what He wants. When our will and God’s Will align, we will never want for anything other than what comes from Him, and we will be truly happy. After all, this is what we were created for.

Being Mindful of God

November 2017, ,

Melissa Gutierrez Lopez, Senior Anchor Intern

“Highs? Lows? Where have I seen God?”

This is a little exercise that my Compass group did my freshman year, way back in 2014. Each week, we would start our meetings by sharing some highlights and lowlights about that week and by answering the question “Where have I seen God?” This was my favorite part.

Now a Senior, I remember this exercise because it left an impact on my spiritual life. When I first heard it, I saw it as a challenge to look for God in every encounter and every moment, especially since I wanted to have something to share at the beginning of each Compass meeting. I thought it was nice, because I was constantly reminded that God is with me and found comfort that His presence can be made known, even in unexpected ways. What was great about this retrospective question was that for me, it was a practice that involved appreciating God’s will and presence in every moment of my life. It became a habit to find God at times and places that people wouldn’t normally think of, as in not just at the Grotto, in a chapel, or at Mass. I found myself recognizing God in my walks to class through God Quad, in the laughter that I shared with my friends, and in the multiple instances of admiring nature. It was in these small moments that I was able to turn to God, become attentive to Him, and give Him thanks for the many blessings in my life. He felt more real and I felt my spirituality and faith growing.         

Now, it has been about three years since I was in that Compass group, and every now and then, I’d have little moments that remind me of that challenge I once had. I now feel like I have lost the habit of being mindful of God. I say grace before my meals, I give thanks at Mass, and I pray. But, I feel like I am no longer as attentive as I used to be. Somewhere along the way I’ve forgotten this habit and find myself needing to focus on getting through my responsibilities, especially when I’m having difficult days.

The Grotto is a special place of prayer for many students.

However, God surprises me by making His presence known, even when I’m not being attentive. One example is a day that I wasn’t feeling myself and I decided to go out for a walk. I didn’t expect to run into anyone or have anything in particular happen. I just ventured out to roam around and clear my head of the lonely sensation that I was beginning to feel. I decided to make my way to the Grotto and randomly met a friend whom I hadn’t talked to in a while. It was nice running into her and having the opportunity to chat for a bit, especially because of how I was feeling. After we parted ways, I thought about this accidental encounter. It felt like a purposeful encounter of God’s love, for it was an unexpected moment where I was reminded that I am not alone. I felt God near even in the midst of loneliness.

The reality is that God is always present, regardless of whether or not I am attentive to Him. Even if I am not aware, He is there, ready to receive my attention when I turn towards Him even if it is just for a single moment in my day. Realizing this, I hope that can be more mindful of God, become closer to Him, and grow in my faith.